Hey everyone happy Sunday!
I hope you are all doing great!
For this week's post, I'm going to be talking about The 5 Love languages by Gary Chapman.
Essentially he outlines that there are 5 different ways that you can express your love for someone. Below are the different ways and examples for each.
Words of Affirmation; compliments/words of assurance/positive statements.
Acts of Service; Doing the dishes, making them breakfast, cleaning up the house
Receiving Gifts; Giving a present
Quality Time; Any time where you are actively engaged with the other person
Physical Touch; Hugs, kisses, hand-holding, sex
In the book, it is stated that everyone has the primary love language that they are most receptive too and the second one which is also a very effective way to express love to that individual.
One of the keys to a long-lasting and satisfying relationship that Gary outlined is that couples need to show affection that resonates with there partners love languages.
Often when there seems to be a disconnect it is because we are speaking the wrong love language or not speaking it at all.
What I would like to encourage you all to do is figure out what your partners love language is both their primary and secondary and seek to make sure to do things that resonate with them!
For myself, I got Acts of Service and Physical Touch. My girlfriend got Quality Time and Physical Touch.
I always make sure that when my girlfriend and I are hanging out together that I am fully present (not on my phone or distracted in any way) and that we are often cuddling or near each other.
Now there are two ways you can figure out each others love languages, 1 trial and error and 2 take the test below. You can just experiment by cycling through different acts of love and seeing which one gets the most positive response.
After you find their love language you must be able to satisfy it. For example, if someones are words of affirmation and you only give them 1 compliment a day that might not be enough. Therefore it is critical to make sure that you are communicating with them!
There is an easy way to do this that's outlined in the book. All you need to do is ask the person "hey on a scale of 1 to 10 how full is your love tank". Anything less than an 8 and you need to dive in deeper to see what you can do to make them feel more loved!
One last thing that I wanted to mention is that the idea of the 5 love languages applies to all kinds of relationships too. If you can figure out your friends, co-workers and even clients different languages then this will allow you to have a stronger relationship!
Well, thanks again everyone and I hope you have a great week!
Have a good one!